"I am so done with dating all these Christian brothers, they hurt me so much and then they lie that God told them we were not supposed to be together. When Segun came to ask me out, he told me God said I was his wife, now he is saying God didn't say so any longer. Does God change His mind? Does God lie? I am just going to date any nice man I meet whether he goes to church or not is none of my business".
Many Christian brothers including myself have had moments when we thought we heard God about a lady we were interested in. Did we truly hear God or we just liked what we saw at the moment and then we simply changed our minds when things didn't go the way we expected?
I will tell you what happened. Many men are expecting to "hear" concerning the woman they want to marry. You have put God in a box and because of that you have deceived yourself. God talks in many ways; it could be the peace in your heart, which to me is the most important factor, it could be the joy you feel in her presence, it could be that good things just start happening to you the moment you started dating her, it could be that her father likes you the moment he sees you. It could just be a knowing that you cannot explain. It is not necessarily a voice or a picture in your spirit.
Marriage is practical so God will give you someone you can learn from, protect, appreciate and be proud of. God's plan is a family plan, the choice of a spouse is crucial to Him. He cares about your choice 100%!
Ladies don't date a nice man who doesn't love God and doesn't go to church because the Christian brother you are dating broke your heart. The most important factor in choosing to marry a man should be is love and fear for God. If you get that part right, everything will fall in place.
You will never meet a perfect man and you are not perfect yourself so you will teach each other to become better people.
The fear and love of God will also constrain him. No compassion, love, respect and responsibility can keep a man faithful. Only the fear of God keeps a man faithful. A man can love his wife to the moon and back and still cheat on her.
To men, sleeping around is a sport, it's not emotional. He could have a beautiful wife and still cheat with the secretary simply because he likes her voice or the shape of her bum or he just wonders what she would be like on the bed. The fear of God prevents a man from carrying out his sexual fantasies with any other woman apart from his wife.
Dear sister, Brother Richard, Emeka, Collins, Segun, Niyi, James and Femi may have broken your heart but only one man will be right. Trust God to send him your way, don't give up, stay with God and He will honour you.
The bible says in Proverbs 3: 5-6 (NIV) 5Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.a